"Not Now Kitten, The Walls Are Closing In On Daddy" Funny Hat

Engineered for people whose internal alarm bells are permanently set to high.

Dont Destroy the Hat

Spot clean only: Because putting a panic attack in the washing machine is asking for trouble.

Do not bleach: Keep the vintage wash intact so you look weathered naturally.

Do not tumble dry: Let it air-dry while you stare at the ceiling fan.

Do not iron: Creases add character; so does unmanaged stress.

The boring-but-important stuff:

Printed to order just for you — it usually takes 2–7 business days to print before it ships, so it’s worth the wait. Classic unisex fit, true to size. Machine wash cold, tumble dry low. Something wrong with your order? Message us and we’ll make it right.