Hot off the press
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The official problem finder
What's your problem?
Answer 4 stupid questions. We'll scientifically* determine your Problem Level and match you with shirts that fit your damage. (*not scientific)
The problem with normal shirts
They're for normal people.
Fresh off the press
This week's damage
The freshest bad ideas. Rotated whenever the group chat delivers.
From group chat to doorstep
How the damage gets made
You bring the joke
Every design starts as something someone said in the group chat that made everyone lose it.
We print the crime
Printed to order on soft ring-spun cotton. Nothing mass-produced, nothing collecting dust in a warehouse.
You wear the consequences
Strangers will stare. Family dinners get awkward. Your group chat gets the photo first.
Wall of shame
Nothing here yet.
No one's sent us their bad decisions wearing our shirts. That ends with you. Order the thing, wear it somewhere regrettable, and claim your spot.
Start your shameReal customers. Real bad decisions. Coming soon.
No corporate speak
The fine print, unfiltered
Every shirt is printed to order just for you — nothing sits in a warehouse. Printing takes 2–7 business days, then another 3–7 for US shipping. Figure roughly 1–2 weeks from click to doorstep. Good things take time. Great shirts take slightly longer.
Classic unisex fit, true to size. Want it baggy? Size up. Want it painted on? That's your call.
Soft ring-spun cotton blanks with crisp DTG/DTF printing that survives the wash. Machine wash cold, tumble dry low — and don't iron directly on the print unless you enjoy ruining things.
Here's the honest version: everything is printed to order, so we can't take it back and resell it. But if your order shows up wrong, damaged, or the print looks messed up — message us and we'll make it right. Reprint or refund, your call.
Message us fast. If it hasn't hit the printer yet, we'll sort it out. If it's already printing — too late. That shirt has your name on it now. Literally.
All over the US, plus international. International takes longer and your country might charge customs fees — that's between you and your government.
Last chance to be normal
Your group chat already voted.
No wrong answers. Only consequences.
Shop all the damage